Christina did an excellent job and provided us with some excellent feedback on the book. We will take in her remarks. She clearly communicates with us and is willing to please us. A truly great collaborator. Thank you Christina.
“You kissed her?” I said
“Yes.” He eyed me carefully and I saw him breathe deeply. I know he had been avoiding this conversation for this reason specifically, he was afraid to hurt me. I think he suspects that my feelings go deeper than I allow to show and they do. But I can’t do anything about it and he knows that. I am his superior, he is under my command. If I did anything to jeopardize our mission I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. I sigh heavily, choosing my words carefully trying to mask my true feelings.
“What possessed you to kiss her?” My words spew out more harshly than I had intended. I look away from him, biting back my tears.
“I don’t know.” He exhales sharply, hurt from the stinging of my words still ringing in his ears. I wonder if he’s aware of how often I stare at his ears, wondering what they would taste like between my lips. I flush red, realizing that he’s looking back at me and a smile crosses my face. “What?” He asks confused, but he damn well knows what I was thinking about, a smug smile forming on his lips.
”Nothing.” I smile back and shift uncomfortably in my chair. Oh yeah I think he knows how I feel.
“It didn’t mean anything. I swear.” He tries giving me his boyish smile and I just roll my eyes, not convinced. “Elizabeth” He begins, but I don’t want to hear it.
“I wasn’t my self.”
“Then what were you?”
“Sure you were.”
“I swear it! Even she was surprised when I kissed her and did not welcome my affections at all. There’s nothing going on between us. I don’t love her. She was just a good friend and a pretty face nearby when I got the urge to kiss her. I have never wanted to do that to her and I never would.” He pleads with me, hoping I will forgive him. I think he knows how much this hurt me, more than it should. I wish it was me he had kissed.
“This won’t happen again?”
“I swear it. Never again. I’ll never touch her again. I promise. It meant nothing to me. And to her.”
“John.” I stop him and he raises an eyebrow.
“Won’t happen again, I promise.” He wants to say more, but I stop him before I reveal too much of my own emotions towards him.
“Good. Dismissed.” He nods, standing up and leaving my office his steps a little more relaxed than they were when he first came in. I sigh, trying to get my emotions under control as my eyes travel up to his ass. He turns and smiles at me, winking, and I blush, turning my face back to my laptop on my desk. I am so screwed. He definitely knows now.